Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Why I'm going to hell.. or at least one reason..

Katsidhe over at Tapetum Lucidum cracked me up yesterday (as she usually does) with a post about prudes that we are surrounded by who can't handle it when we get a bit potty-mouthed at times. Okay, she gets a lot potty-mouthed, but so can I on occasion. I should do that NOW since I lost TWO freaking followers because of my stupid news post yesterday. I mean... What. The. Fuck?! Did I offend 2 meth heads or 2 battered women or what? I don't get it. I'll get over it, but making my way to 100 does not happen by going backwards. Although I think I got a new one yesterday so that took some of the sting away. You didn't come here to hear me rant though, so I'll get on with it. Ahem!

Anyway, Kat's post made me think of something that happened several years ago when my potty mouth tried to get me in trouble with the Lord. Well, kinda... We used to have season tickets to our local minor league hockey team who are no longer here. We had a blast at the games, and pretty much everyone in our section had been season ticket holders in the same seats since the start of the team several years before that.
Source
If you've never been to a minor league hockey game, hockey fans are a hoot! We can be a rowdy bunch, much like the players because these guys are trying to make it to the big leagues so they play hard. We got many people hooked who hated hockey before actually attending a game.

However, this particular night our top goalie was out with a major injury and wouldn't be back for months, if ever. We were all pretty upset about it, but they had to put in the rookie who was this punk kid from Harvard who hadn't had to start a game yet. As a person, I loved him. As a player, he hadn't proven a thing to us yet. Being the minors, we had to have an amateur (someone who just played in the local men's hockey league) dress as backup on the bench that night because you can't just pick up a goalie overnight like you can in the NHL.

I am normally a very supportive fan, but there is only so much a girl can take. This goalie (who we called Luc-pronounced "loosh") was having the worst game in the history of our team. We were down like 6-1 and our goalie let in another puck. After which, I promptly stood up and screamed, "Luc, you are a sorry sack of SHIT!" I'm sure I looked something like this at the time.
Source
A man who had been sitting in our section for years with his wife and sometimes with his granddaughters who did nothing but color or sleep at the games got up and came over to my seat. He stood in the row in front of me and leaned over so far that I had to lean back to keep him from being too close to my personal space.

He proceeded to go on and on about how he was a preacher and he didn't appreciate my language in front of children. Of course, I looked over his shoulder and his granddaughters were sound asleep. I let him go on for a few minutes, before I stood up so he would back the hell off.

Me: Are you finished? Because I'd really like to say my peace now. You are at a HOCKEY game, Mister. You have sat in this section and renewed your season tickets year after year when you could move anywhere else in this arena. You know how all of us are in this section, and we have never sat here quietly watching the games. Those kids with you are oblivious to what's going on to the point that they could get nailed in the head with a puck! Feel free to move your season tickets, and I'm sure you'll hear much worse than what has come out of my mouth. So you can go back to your seat, get out of my face, and kiss my ass! I am not in church, and I don't appreciate you coming over here to preach at me.

He went back to his seat with a glance at my parents who were sitting beside me who just looked on stunned that he had even approached us. My mother patted me on the back (gotta love that woman!) and my friends who sat in front of me turned around to ask what the hell he had just said to me. Misty, who had 2 small children of her own, promptly turned around, looking right toward him and said, "FUCK HIM!" God bless her. I wanted to kiss her at that point.
Source
I mean I'm probably going to hell now, but at least I managed to hold my tongue with the man with the exception of telling him to kiss my ass. It was a hockey game after all, regardless of whether or not we live in the Bible Belt. And I'll have plenty of friends there with me when I go, I'm sure.

By the way, he never changed his seats to another section.

P.S. Kat showed her puppies for all of you menfolk's heart health like Oilfield Trash requested. I didn't want to tell you before now because I wanted to finish my damn story. So go enjoy and show her some love for the sacrifice.

28 comments:

Oilfield Trash said...

I love me some minor league hockey. We have the Aeros here in Houston and I am always taking me kids to their games. Some of the fans are a little "rowdy" but I like it.

Jack said...

The Preacher- sounds like a good title for a post.

Katsidhe said...

I laughed when I read "okay she gets a lot potty-mouthed". XD

I'm so glad that you gave that preacher man what for. It's ridiculous to go to a sporting event and not expect colorful language. He better never visit Philly during football season then. My language is tame compared with the average fan. O_O

That you so much for the shout-out, too, love.~ *hugs*

Krissy said...

OT.. *sigh* I miss our team!

Jack.. Oh, should I have used that instead? Damn if simple isn't usually better.

Kat.. You are very welcome, and I wouldn't change a thing about ya! Muah! Yeah, that preacher has no clue how I am watching a Steelers game at home... or other places, really.

Abby said...

I think we were separated at birth, given the animal thing and the fact that I have the mouth of a sailor and a rabid interest in hockey of any variety.

I was actually an intern for our minor league hockey team in college and worked up in the press box, the press box where you're not supposed to cheer (or apparently curse) throughout the whole game. It was a season of restraint, but being down by the locker rooms after was worth biting my tongue ;)

OK. I've probably offended someone, but no apologies (unless it was you, as it's your blog.) Rock on.

Average Girl said...

Don't fret over losing two.. you should see how many have hopped on and off my blog since the conception of it. It's really hard to please everyone and that was what was driving me crazy over on Its an Average Life, really crazy, it was like my followers were taking control over my content of my blog and it I was being dictated too and all of sudden, there was no fun in it!

Anywhoo, I saw your little comment over at SD's. I miss ya too.

But I am still in the blogosphere, in a quiet little corner with next to nothing in followers and you can always find me there, at

asidreamit.blogspot.com
and one i am just going to start posting on soon called
onewomansmidlifecrisis.blogspot.com

Cheers darlin!

Krissy said...

Abby.. We very well might be! I've found so many kindred spirits in the blog world that I'm beginning to think it's us sane ones who gravitate toward each other. I'll have to tell you about my further involvement with our hockey team later. It's a blast! Don't worry about offending anyone around here. Those I care about wouldn't be offended anyway.

AG.. I'm not fretting, but I thought it was a strange time to leave. Oh well. I won't let them dictate my life or my blog. Maybe it's just two people who decided not to blog anymore because they never contacted me. I'm glad you didn't abandon blogging. You have at least one more follower on both of your new blogs now. Yay! :)

The Tame One said...

I know NOTHING about hockey. I wish I did.

Rawknrobyn.blogspot.com said...

I knew I loved you for good reason, Krissy. Virtual high-fives to you, girlfriend!
I might get in trouble for saying this but preachers can be the worst. I'll be fair and say that rabbis can too.
xoRobyn

Krissy said...

Tame One.. I'm sure you know irritating people like that though. Hockey is so easy to learn. That's why we really were able to hook more women so easily. There are very few rules.

Robyn.. High-fives back atcha! I'm glad you now have a reason to love me .. or love me more. Yes, preachers can be, which reminds me of two other stories! :)

Nicki said...

Fuck the lost followers. If you can't be yourself, why should we read you? Hey, (brace yourself for a cliche) if you can't stand the heat, get out of the blogging kitchen.

AND I FUCKING LOVE HOCKEY.




That felt so good.

J.Day said...

I, apparently, am having an invite only party in my own little corner of Hell. And after reading what you said to the nice preacher man, you are totally on my list to get in. LOL Seriously, the guy's at a hockey game . . . every sporting even is like that. Literally.

Krissy said...

Nicki.. Amen to everything you said! I soooo want to go to a hockey game with you, cocktails included, of course.

J.Day.. That would be awesome, but I'm pretty sure I'm older than you. So barring any tragedy I hope never happens, is this invitation thing so I can set up the party for you before you get there? LOL

Everyone... I just had a cocktail induced thought. I know, STAND BACK! Do you think he picked that time to get in my face because it was probably the first time I cussed our own player that vocally? Hmmm... He can still kiss my ass, but just sayin'...

Al Penwasser said...

Cussing? At a hockey game? Shocking!
What an asshole.
Shoulda told him you worshipped Satan.

Krissy said...

Al.. Ummm, I preferred my answer. I think that statement would have made all action in the arena stop except the slaughter that was going on on the ice seeing as how I live in the freaking Bible Belt. Funny that I got more people on my side by cussing a preacher. Go figure!

caterpillar said...

Wonder what his problem was?

Krissy said...

caterpillar.. Since I'm probably already going to hell, I would think he was just as upset about the game, and he had a stick up his ass, dear. :)

On My Soapbox said...

Bahaha! I love it, and would have applauded you had I been there! I don't believe in all the "hellfire and punishment" stuff, but if someone tells me to go to hell, I respond with something like, "I hope so, because all of my friends will be there!"

On My Soapbox said...

BTW, when I went to hockey games (when I was in my twenties), we would throw dead fish onto the ice. I don't remember why. Then again, it's amazing I even remembered that, considering the amount of beer we drank....

Don said...

I've read where people have said they were removed from being a follower without their knowledge....some sort of technical glitch, I guess.

Krissy said...

Soapbox.. I'll save ya a seat! :) I didn't drink at games since I was rowdy enough sober. Now after the games, the drinking was ON!

Don.. Well, thanks for trying to make me feel better anyway! Hope they are back. I know I've discovered I'm not following people who I thought I was following, but that could just be because I'm retarded. :)

vickilikesfrogs said...

Well damn. It's not like you gave a lap-dance at church or something. Geez. Good for you for standing up and giving him what he deserved!

You have an award over at Glitter Frog, btw!

Krissy said...

I know, right? Thanks for the encouragement, and the award! I love awards. :D

Heather (aka Sugar Free) said...

Well, you have a new follower now. Although having the likes of me here might give you a bad name.

Hockey. Fuck yeah.

Krissy said...

Glad to have ya, hell-bound or not, Heather! And ditto on the following thing.

bruce said...

My followeres goes up and down, so i just don't giva damn anymore...

i love me some hockey and when i go to a game, it is tough shit people! i will cuss if i wanna...if they didn't want cussing they should not have introduced $ beers...

on my stupid stuff blog where most of what i do is lob the f*bomb and rant a bout sh*t, i actually loose followers and that i do not understand...

WTF, i state right in the welcome that i will offend you and do not appologize...

i welcome the nubies and fuck the weenies that leave...

Krissy said...

Bruce.. That makes absolutely no sense that people would leave that one when you've told them up front what the blog is about. Stupid people suck! And amen to the other stuff about cussing at hockey games.

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